1,000 Reasons Not to Live Before You Die!

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March 26, 2010 by MK


No Cussing Club founder tells Biden to button it:

The teenager who persuaded the California Assembly to approve a No Cussing resolution earlier this month has a message for Vice President Joe Biden: Watch your mouth.

South Pasadena High School student McKay Hatch has called a news conference for 3 p.m. today in front of his city’s post office. He says he plans to ask the vice president to apologize for letting a profanity slip during a bill-signing ceremony earlier this week.

Where’s the damn school bully when you need him?  Maybe he thought it was enough to call him “McGay” and move on.  Well, that kind of lazy homophobia ain’t gettin’ it done these days, school bullies.  Follow McKay Hatch home and rob his lucrative Swear Jar.  Hire a trenchcoated John Cusack to stand outside his window holding a boombox that plays Cee Lo’s “Fuck You.”  If you’re not yet persuaded, the following should do the trick:

Wouldn’t it have been great if after he implored the crowd of soul-numbed teens to yell, “Don’t cuss!” they responded back with “Fuck a face!” or “Eat all shit!” or “Stop wasting our time with some nonsense your mom said she’d raise your allowance for and let’s focus on something that actually matters, you know, like ANYTHING ELSE!  Wait.  You wrote a fucking book about this shit?!  Not only is there no God, there is no meaning to be had from this forever trivial existence.  Why wake up?”

Thanks God.  Thanks a lot.


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