January 8, 2009 by MK
If you were to pick the pockets of all of the above, which wallet would say “Bad Muthaf*cka” on it?
Jimmy “F’ing” Carter, that’s who.
Take a look at that picture. All the proud presidents, shoulder to shoulder. Except for Bad Muthaf*cka. He’s off to the side a bit, warily watching around the Oval for someone with a knife.
Many would call the man a mediocre, even terrible, president. Most know him as a Christian. All can see the wonderful charity work he’s done through endeavors like Habitat for Humanity. But underestimate “F’ing” at your own peril.
He would talk smack about Clinton back in the day. Think about that. A one-termer taking it to the two-termer… in his own party! Bad Muthaf*cka was also among the first to tear into our Great Patriot President, George W. Bush. And, if you’ve seen him in an interview, having to defend his use of the word “Apartheid” when discussing the Israel/Palestine situation, the man is strictly Tom Petty about it. He. Won’t. Back. Down.
Check out his eyes, which are the windows to the murder wheels turning in his head. The gracious smile slowly drains from his face until all but a sewer of contempt is left. I’m just saying, if you see an old man with a look like that in an alley way, run and run fast. Don’t let the Georgia lilt fool you. The man knows one mode: Attack.
So call him all the names you want. Remember the oil shortages. Remember inflation. Remember the hostages in Iran. But also. Remember this. You’ll know Jimmy Carter’s wallet when you find it on the street. And you’d better return it to its owner. Immediately.